Bullies - What can we do about them?

When I was a kid I had to face bullies often.  I was luckier than many of those who bullies go after because it was not as constant as it is for many children.  When I was in high school I struck back and almost killed a bully.  

I got tired of his bullying and smacked him in the back of the head.  He asked if I wanted to fight.  Why did he think I smacked him in the back of the head?

After school we went to the field on the hill above the school.  He fought like a boxer and I fought like a wrestler.  I was big.  I let him hit me for a while and bled all over him then I got behind him and got him in a bear hug.  The onlookers (who were bullies too)  tried to get me to let him go.  They finally pulled me off of him.  If it had been any later I think he would have died.

From then on I never fought again but I also learned how to scare the bullies away.  When  I was in the hood I was known as the Crazy Old White Man.  I had a reputation of being dangerous.  My friends spread the word that you did not mess with that crazy old white man.  I spend a lot of time in the streets now and I do get my respect because I show no fear and I give others respect too.

I am not going to say that acting like a tough guy is going to help you if you run into a bully.  It might but if you do not look the part it may not.  Try ignoring them.  Do not show fear.  Build yourself up to yourself.  Do not believe what they say and realize that you are better than they are.  Hold your head up high .  If possible take lessons in self defense.  If you have access to the internet go to a search engine and put bully in there and check out the sites.  May want to add other key words like stop and defend.

Fight to have action taken against the bullies.  I have  some links listed where you can go to learn about bullies and what to do about them.  I feel that bullies should be treated like any other perpetrators of assault.  The schools have to report bullies to the police and they must be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.  Most of those who are involved in the school killings like Columbine are victims of bullies who were pushed too far.  

I have a feeling that many bullies are bullied by their fathers and/or older siblings.  If this is the case I think the parents should also be held accountable.

Bullying is not always physical but probably more often mental.  Picking something different about a person and taunting them because of that difference.  What the bully does not realize is that the person may have a breaking point and when they reach that point they may strike back.  In the past few years there have been more cases of young people snapping because of the bully.  The ease of getting the weapons makes it even more volital.  

I am sure that there are warning signs that could be spotted by the parents and the school officials.  I am sure that the schools and the parents could do something to stop the bullying if they worked together.  It seems like no one cares until tragedy strikes. Soon after the lesson is forgotten by many.  The victims remember and in these cases everyone touched is a victim.  The child who commits the act of revenge is a victim.  

If I would have killed my bully  I may have been tried as a juvenile.  (At that time I do not think they tried juveniles as adults)
I was 16 so I may have ended up in a youth facillity until I was 21.   About a year later I went into the Navy  and got out just before I was 21.  I guess that was my prison.

What should the system do to those who commit murder in revenge because of a bully?  Should the bully's victim be tried as an adult or as a juvenile?  Should they be committed into a mental hospital and be released when the doctors say that they are no longer a danger to themselves and society?   I would tend to agree with the last question.  

For some reason the schools do not seem to do anything about bullies.  I just can not believe that they do not have witnesses and that the school officials never see anything.  Are the school officials afraid of the bullies and/or their parents?  Do they just put their heads in the sand and think the problem will go away?  Do they Care?

It is the job of the education system to educate.  The bullies interfere with that job and therefore should be removed from the school and sent to a school where they will not be able to continue being bullies.

Schools have to do more to catch the bullies.  Teachers have to report bullies.  There must be school assemblies about bullies and how to stop them.  

If you are being bullied or being a bully, if you are a parent of the bully or the bully's victim, if you are a teacher, school administrator or a law enforcement official and would like to share your story or thoughts, please e-mail me with your writing and I will add a web page to this section.  If you have pictures or drawings that will make your page more meaningful please attach them to your e-mail.  Send your e-mail to Lee Gaylord and put bullies on the subject line.

I am using yellow because bullies are usually cowards.

Thank you.

Bully Police


Jared's Story

The Wounded Child Project

Taking the Bully by the Horns

No-Bully  The California anti-bullying project

Safe Child Program - Bullies

Bullies -This website will give you some clues on how to have a happy life.

Kids Healt Organization - Dealing with Bullies

North Dakota State University, Bullies by Laura DeHaan, Ph.D., Assistant Professor of Child Development
 
Dealing with Bullies and How Not to be One by Carol E. Watkins, M.D.

Bullies - Tips for grownups

Bullying and Teasing Victims - From Bullies to Buddies

 

Peer Abuse Know More

 

You and Me Bully Free

Main Castle Site Map

All Sites Map